Parenting
The Partnership Imbalance Nobody Wants to Name
The Partnership Imbalance Nobody Wants to Name It’s 9 PM. The dishes are half-done, the kids’ lunch boxes still need packing, and someone has to remember that tomorrow is picture day and the permission slip is due. One of you is scrolling through your phone on the couch—not because they’re lazy, but because their brain […]
The Permission Your Child is Waiting to Hear
The Permission Your Child is Waiting to Hear I watched a father and his eight-year-old daughter in my office. She’d just spilled her entire cup of water during our session — everywhere. Her face crumpled instantly, not from the mess, but from shame. Before I could even grab paper towels, she whispered, “I’m so stupid. […]
Why Your Family Needs More Unstructured Time
Why Your Family Needs More Unstructured Time Last Tuesday, I watched a father in my office pull out his phone to show me his family’s calendar. He scrolled. And scrolled. And scrolled some more. Soccer practice, piano lessons, tutoring, birthday parties, orthodontist appointments, and something called “enrichment club” that neither of us could quite define. […]
Why Your Sensitive Child Sees What Others Miss
You Are Not Alone She’s standing in the doorway again, tears streaming down her face because her brother’s shoelaces are “too crooked.” To anyone else, it looks like nothing. But to your sensitive child, it’s a seismic event — a crack in the order of the universe that only she can see. You want to […]
The Scapegoat Dynamic Nobody Wants to See
The Family Role Nobody Chose, but Someone Always Plays There’s a moment that happens in families—quiet, almost invisible—when everyone agrees, without ever saying it out loud, that one person is the problem. Maybe it’s the kid who “always” starts the fights. The teenager whose attitude “ruins” every dinner. The sibling who somehow became the lightning […]
The Consequence That Actually Changes Behavior
The Consequence That Actually Changes Behavior I watched a dad in the grocery store lock eyes with his seven-year-old who’d just thrown a box of crackers on the floor—again. “That’s it,” he said, voice tight with frustration. “No iPad for a month!” The boy’s face crumpled. The dad looked exhausted. And I knew, with the […]
What Your Family’s Busyness is Really About
What Your Family’s Busyness Is Really About Last Tuesday, I watched a mom in the grocery store parking lot. She was sitting in her car, engine off, staring at her phone calendar with the kind of expression you’d expect from someone decoding ancient hieroglyphics. Soccer practice, piano lessons, parent-teacher conferences, a work deadline, someone’s birthday […]
What Your Family’s Communication Style Says About Emotional Safety
What Your Family’s Communication Style Says About Emotional Safety I watched a dad in my office literally freeze mid-sentence when his 9-year-old daughter interrupted him. Not because he was angry — but because in his own childhood, interrupting meant danger. He’d learned to go silent, small, invisible. Now, decades later, he was teaching his daughter […]
What Your Sex Life is Revealing About Your Communication
The Conversation You’re Not Having (But Your Body Already Is) Last week, a couple sat in my office describing what they called “roommate syndrome.” They co-parented brilliantly, tag-teamed bedtime like pros, and could coordinate carpool schedules with military precision. But intimacy? That had become another item on an impossible to-do list—one they kept postponing until […]
What Your Child’s Aggression is Desperately Trying to Tell You
The Moment That Changes Everything It happened again this morning. Your sweet child — the one who still asks for extra hugs at bedtime — shoved their sibling so hard they both ended up in tears. Or maybe it was the toy thrown across the room, the bite mark on another kid’s arm, or that […]